Holiday Gifts for the Filthy Rich
Masters of the Universe love to lap up luxury goods.
You know the type. They blow by you on the Merritt Parkway in exotic sports cars. You often overhear them berating waiters who get stingy with truffle shavings. Their Blackberry’s get more attention than their children. They work hard and play harder...and are notoriously tough to please.
Coach (COH-NYSE) might be considered a luxury good to middle americans, but the average MOTU wouldn’t be caught dead schlepping cheap cow around 06831. They will re-gift it to their nanny’s, however.
And nothing is more insulting to the new money crowd than being on the receiving end of a bottle of cheap wine or booze. Critter labels and Two-Buck Chuck have no place in their McMansion. Indeed, they would probably admit to watching Savanna’s movies in their Range Rover’s before they would fess up to drinking her wine.
So what do you get the person who has everything?
The WinePod will likely pass muster with the Master...watch them plug a Bloomberg in and ferment away the slow trading days.
Getting crushed in a stock leaves a bad taste in your mouth. Crushing wine is a lot more palatable.
Win One For the Gipper
A legend of college football will be watching tomorrow’s game from the Big House in the Sky.
Michigan coaching legend Bo Schembechler has died after collapsing Friday morning, Detroit-area television station WXYZ reported. He was 77.
Schembechler collapsed at WXYZ’s studios in Southfield as he prepared to tape the “Big Ten Ticket” show and was taken to Providence Hospital, the ABC affiliate said. Story
Rest in Peace, Bo.
Maize and Blue by a touchdown…
A Thank You to Our Readers
Several Wall Street Conferences are on our schedule this week. Which means of course, we will be the recipients of a time honored wall street tradition, the conference satchel tchotchke.
tchotchke-A small, decorative item or souvenir, usually of no particular value.
These free goodies, which are typically emblazoned with the logo of the sponsoring investment bank, do in fact sport retail values equal to approximately 4.50 copies of Barron’s, and are highly coveted by the big money crowd. Portfolio managers and analysts often squeal with delight upon being presented with tchotchke’s at the registration table. Unseemly behavior no doubt, but all too common. It would seem overpaid, egotistical wall streeters love freebie’s more than main streeters.
The bags, which are theoretically used to tote annual reports and sell-side research, are usually emptied quickly of such useless garbage and surreptitiously filled with the candy and soda that are given away gratis to money managers in attendance. The contraband is then carted off the premises and consumed.
Based on this behavior we would guess that over 50% of buysiders have prior convictions for shoplifting.
Since we will likely be on the receiving end of such sell-side largesse, we thought we would take the opportunity to cull our closets of detritus and enrich a lucky reader at the same time.
And thus the first UTC Tchotchke Sweepstakes, which hopefully will turn out better than the sweepstakes run by Reader’s Digest (RDA-NYSE) some years back.
Life in the Fast Lane
Getting out of Gotham every now and again keeps us sane. We love to fly into SkyHarbor in November, work on our tan and take in the local sights.
Which in Scottsdale of course means garish plastic surgery, porsche carrera convertibles and “For Sale” signs on nearly 30% of the houses we drive by.
But our holiday in the Sonoran Desert has been anything but relaxing. Its not the old folks and their geriatric groupies, driving 45 mph in the left lane of the 101 freeway, who are annoying us. Or the Budweiser swilling Nascar fans in town for this weekend’s race who weave in and out of traffic at 110 mph.
Its the waiters at the local watering holes.
cheezeborger cheezeborger
The Windy City holds a soft spot in our hearts here at UTC. Although its been over a decade since we traded sharp elbows in the pits of the CME, we miss the greasy spoons that dot the landscape.
The Wiener Circle comes to mind. And of course the famous Billy Goat Tavern, the diner that provided the source of inspiration for a series of legendary skits from comic genius John Belushi.
Spiros “Sig” Segalas of JennisonDryden is a genius as well. With his flagship Harbor Capital Appreciation fund (HACAX) sporting a track record more impressive than John Holmes’ manhood, Segalas has long been a Big Swingin’ Dick on the street.
Dinosaur Calls it a Day
The Wall Street Journal is reporting that veteran Goldman Sachs software analyst Rick Sherlund will be transitioning coverage to fellow Goldman analyst Sarah Friar ...and moving to a hedge fund if we had to venture a guess...after all everybody is doing it:
In an interview, Mr. Sherlund said he hopes to try his hand as an investor, though he plans to continue to work at Goldman as he considers jobs on what Wall Street calls the buy side.
”I’m really focused on managing money,” he said. “As an analyst it’s terrifically rewarding but you’re very narrowly focused. I’d like to focus more broadly and have the ability to make some real stock calls.”
Mr. Sherlund, 52 years old, is considering starting his own fund but said “most likely I’ll go work with someone else to gain some experience in the money-management side.”
Mr. Sherlund’s name will always be most closely associated with Microsoft, a company he started covering when it when public in 1986. Year after year, Mr. Sherlund doggedly studied the latest technologies and re-organizations as Microsoft moved from start-up to Grand Dame of software. Over the years, he also covered the many up-and-comers—from Netscape Communications to Google Inc.—that have pressured Microsoft and he has outlasted many of the managers that guided Microsoft, including a string of chief financial officers. (WSJ)
Sherlund, 52 years old, has been covering software for...get this..100 quarters…
With half of Wall Street turrets staffed by people who were still in diapers when Microsoft went public, Sherlund’s career as an analyst is notable.
Welcome to the buyside Rick...but fair warning...we will soon be trying to pick your pockets.
