Top 10 reasons we hate CFA’s

by StockJockey

Thursday, October 26, 2006 - 11:51 pm

We are not haters here at underthecounter.

We will admit to bouts of schadenfreude, usually directed at idiots who passed us over for a job or promotion in years past. And not a day goes by that we don’t yell “DIE DIE DIE” at our multiple monitors as our shorts begin their inevitable descent into hell. But honestly, we love all of god’s creatures.

Except for CFA’s.

Thus, we are thinking of banning CFA’s from reading underthecounter. They are not hard to pick out from a crowd as we can smell their arrogance from a mile away. For what its worth, they smell like a green eyeshade crossed with a cheap suit.

Without further ado, and with apologies to David Letterman...our top ten list.

WHY WE HATE CFA’s

10) They are so damn smug because they passed a stupid test. OK three tests

9) The CFA Institute reminds us of a cult. Its scientology for bean counters

8) CFA’s make lousy wingmen. They repel women

7) Charlottesville, VA was part of the Confederacy. The rebs lost the civil war. We hate losers

6) CFA’s hide behind their credential after bottom-quartile performance

5) CFA charterholders mock their Code of Ethics when they are drunk. Thats just wrong

4) 52% of the people who passed the exam before 1993 had their roommate take it for them

3) CFA shingles are uglier than most of Stevie Cohen’s art collection

2) We have never seen a CFA reading Trader Monthly or Maxim

1) Because they are Cocky Freaking Assholes

Glad I got that off my chest.

Comments:

sounds like you are bitter person who is too stupid to pass a few easy exams. resentment of those who are smarter than you is an ugly thing.

10. most CFA’s don’t take the designation as seriously as you seem to.
9. a rich cult.
8. not in my experience.
7. southern president,southern senate majority leader, even a southern stanley cup champ...real losers.
6. Are you honestly suggesting that the average CFA under-performs their “uncut” peers?
5. just not true.
4. 52% of your readers didn’t graduate from high school.
3. but not as ugly as yo’ mama.
2. a.CFA’s don’t read maxim because we are too busy banging the models you’re drooling over.
b. Also, you are right, CFA’s don’t tend to read comic books, children’s books, or trader monthly.
1. when you got it, flaunt it! The only people who don’t like Cocky Freakin’ Assholes are those who aren’t smart enough to join the club.

Posted by on 12/31/1969 at 03:00 PM

The biggest problem with cfa’s is that they lack a sense of humor. With site visits from charlottesville up 500% since i put up that post, my goal of flipping this site to sumner redstone for a huge profit is within reach. of course, if i need to attract wealthy folk with credentials, i should write a post on nyc-based electricians and plumbers, who earn considerably more than punk ass cfa’s. btw, shouldnt you be in your cubicle running dcf’s for your boss?

Posted by stockjockey on 12/31/1969 at 03:00 PM

I have heard that its most rewarding that y several CA/MBA’s r trying to do it. u can advise me how to clear 3 exams

Posted by on 12/31/1969 at 03:00 PM